Well, good that you asked. Here is the transcript of the fictional event...

Stephen Colbert: "Welcome to the Late Show, I'm your host, Stephen Colbert, and we have a very special guest with us tonight. Please welcome Detective Pux!"

(Applause)

Stephen Colbert: "Detective Pux, it's an honor to have you on the show. You're a legend in the world of crime-solving, and I'm sure our audience is excited to hear about some of your most famous cases."

Detective Pux: "Thank you, Stephen. It's great to be here. I've solved many cases over the years, but I always try to keep things in perspective. It's not about the fame or the glory, it's about finding justice for the victims and their families."

Stephen Colbert: "I couldn't agree more. Now, I know that you're known for your ability to crack even the toughest cases. Can you tell us about one of the most challenging cases you've ever solved?"

Detective Pux: "Well, there was a case that I worked on a few years back where a wealthy businessman's priceless heirloom was stolen. The thief left no clues and all the suspects had alibis. It seemed like an impossible case to solve. But I never give up, I kept digging and eventually, I found the missing piece of the puzzle. It turned out that the businessman's own son had stolen the heirloom to pay off his gambling debts. It was a tough case, but it just goes to show that no case is unsolvable."

Stephen Colbert: "Wow, that's an incredible story. I'm sure our audience is fascinated. Speaking of fascinating, I've heard that you're quite the adventurer. Can you tell us about one of your most exciting adventures?"

Detective Pux: "Well, I've had a lot of exciting adventures over the years, but one that stands out was the time I was investigating a case on a container ship. It was a complex case involving international smuggling, and I had to navigate the ship and deal with some dangerous characters

. But the most exciting part was when I had to jump off the ship and onto a smaller boat to escape a group of armed thugs. It was quite the adrenaline rush, but it all worked out in the end, and I was able to solve the case and bring the smugglers to justice."

Stephen Colbert: "Wow, that's quite a story. It's clear that you're not just a brilliant detective, but also a bit of a daredevil. And what's next for you, Detective Pux? Do you have any new cases or adventures that you're working on?"

Detective Pux: "I always have a few cases on my plate, but I'm also looking to expand my horizons and try something new. I've been thinking about taking up skydiving, or maybe even bungee jumping. I may be getting older, but I believe that it's never too late to try something new and exciting."

Stephen Colbert: "Well, I'm sure whatever you decide to do, you'll do it with the same determination and grit that you bring to your work. Thank you for being here with us tonight, Detective Pux. It's been an honor to have you on the show."

Detective Pux: "Thank you, Stephen. It's been a pleasure."

(Applause)

Stephen Colbert: "And that's it for tonight's show. Tune in tomorrow night when we'll have a special guest, the one and only Beyonce. Goodnight and have a great night."